Mar 20, 09 | Posted by: Michelle Linsmeier, M.D.

Sleep, babies and families (yawn!)

At the beginning of March, Dr. Bencik wrote a blog about infants/babies and sleep.  Specifically, how to help teach your child to fall asleep and stay asleep overnight without parental intervention.  In the blog, Dr. Bencik mentioned two of the most common methods to help in this process.  One of our readers (thanks to all that read this!) asked a great question regarding sleep and our policies as a clinic.  Do we all subscribe to the methods mentioned by Dr. Bencik?  What are our thoughts on other methods?

First, I think I can speak for all of us when I say that the best method is the one that feels right to the parents.  Ultimately it is your child, your home and your sleep that we are talking about.   I think I can also say that none of us feel it is appropriate to dictate methods or “must-dos” – especially with something so diverse as sleep and families.  We are always willing to give advice to anyone asking, but are also willing to appreciate different perspectives and options.  And as a general observation, each one of us has had our own unique challenges and solutions to our children and sleep.  I doubt that any of us feel that there are only one or two correct ways to parent and sleep train.  While we all talk about the methods that Dr. Bencik nicely described in detail, none of us fail to recognize many other techniques for families to follow.

For me personally, sleep and my children was a tough road!  Especially with my first child Nathan.  My husband and I did everything we weren’t “supposed” to as far as teaching Nathan healthy sleeping habits:  I nursed him to sleep at night; one of us would walk him up and down the hallway afterward until he was sound asleep (usually about 10 minutes); and then we would both lay him in his crib (holding his arms and legs still so that he wouldn’t jerk awake).  And often, he would immediately wake up, and the whole process would start again!  And the worst part of the story – we were still doing this every 3-4 hours when he was 8 months old! Yikes! Now wonder I was tired at work!  I know that I sought help from everyone – especially Dr. Paley and Dr. Bencik.  After a lot of worrying, reading of books and encouragement from Dr. Paley (Nathan’s pediatrician), we finally decided at 9 months to use the Ferber method to teach him to soothe himself at night.  Was it easy? No way! Was it painful to listen to him cry for 2 1/2 hours that first night? Yes!  Will I ever forget sitting on the couch crying as I heard him cry upstairs?  No- or not until I’m really old and can’t remember my first name either.  But ultimately I am thankful that I made the choice that I did.  I feel that children are much stronger and more resilient than we give them credit sometimes.  And after only 3 days, my son would smile at me as I lay him into his crib at night, and roll on his side to calmly and quietly fall asleep for the entire night.

This method worked for me.  It doesn’t have to be the choice for everyone.    I have some wonderful patients/ families who chose not the use the Ferber or  Weissbluth methods, but instead let the child decide their own sleeping patterns.  My choice -no.  But it worked for them, and that’s most important.  Dr. Melbye, Dr. Bencik, Dr. Paley and I have our own perspectives and views on pediatric topics-  I think I can speak for all of us in that we hope our patients feel comfortable telling us their perspectives even as we talk about ours.

No Comments »