Feb 8, 10 | Posted by: Kristin Bencik Boudreau, D.O.

I lost my 3 year old at Disney- how my preemptive talk helped me find him

Imagine this- New Year’s Eve at Walt Disneyland, park filled to capacity with over 85,000 people (most of them blowing kazoos), a six week old baby, and losing your 3 year old child. Unfortunately, this was my reality this year. As many of you know, I had my fourth child in November. I thought it would be a great treat for the older kids to go to Disney on the last week of my maternity leave and the last week of their winter vacation. Too bad thousands others felt the same way. I brought my parents so we would have one adult per kid, but circumstances happened that my mom and I ended up with the three younger kids. I went to go park a stroller (lots of stroller parking rules at Disney) and did not know the 3 year old had followed me. It was a classic case of each adult thinking the other one had him. I was not gone more than 3 minutes, but knew as soon as I got back to my mom that he was lost. I immediately started running in the circle we were in screaming his name. I contacted a park official, and within minutes all of the park knew my child was missing. The next twenty minutes were the longest of my life. I felt like I had completely disassociated from my body, almost like watching a show on TV where the mom runs hopelessly in circles searching for the child you know she is not going to find. Every awful scenario runs through your head, and this feeling of nausea overwhelms you. Fortunately, my nightmare ended when the park officials told me they had found him. I went to the lost child center and heard him crying for me, and it was one of the best sounds I had heard in my life. On the way to the center, the park official told me that Cole had gone up to a worker and told him he was lost. As I gathered him in my arms, I told him how proud I was of him- and that he had done exactly what we had told him to do.

As many of you with three year olds know, a lot of them think its fun to run away. Keeping that in mind, my husband and I had prepped all the kids on what to do if they got lost. We explained that they need to find someone with a badge who worked at the park, and go up and tell them they were lost. We also wrote their names and our cell numbers on their upper arms, where they could show the workers. That five minute talk we gave them helped save Cole. I think this story underscores the importance of preparing kids for things that you hope will never happen, but gives them the tools to help themselves if it does. Things like learning their address, phone numbers, and how to contact 911. Defensive tips such as screaming “your not my mommy/daddy” and fighting if someone tries to abduct them. Later talks include how to say no to alcohol and drugs. These talks can be very uncomfortable for us to give, but their importance cannot be underscored.

Many people have asked if Cole stopped running away after he got last- he did for about 24 hours and now he is back to his crazy self. I think that emphasizes the importance of education. He is not scarred because he did what he was told, and everything turned out fine. I on the other hand, am taking a long break from Disney and will NEVER go again over new Year’s Eve! My heart breaks for all the parents who have missing children. Help your children protect themselves- talk to them.

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